&

by heidi andrea restrepo rhodes

& this muscle dappling the pleasure fields of the page: still, the running

heart, the moving line. Its name a perpetual corruption. Et into &.

Form always being other than itself. Ligature in circus, trapezing

heights. & binding, suturing of vein & sound, body lured into repair,

two strings of viola weeping simultaneous. Loneliest words tending

the loneliest world, saying: together together, together, together. We,

we, we, we. What cannot begin to be conceived & what has swept

through the tundra of millennia already. How what dies never dies,

only becomes: water, ash, stardust, ecotone fondnesses between

species. Intuition insisting on being heard over the din of human

hurry. Sensing organ billowing orchestral beyond the body,

ampersand enchantment & descanted melody. & & &: full bellied

satisfaction. Mermaids arching in sun, tails choreographic. Tangled

arms holding you in your tenderest. Fish wearing hats. Bottom lip

trembling. Entanglement’s brackish brute of need mouthing et tois, et

tois, et tois.

—————

On the first line of the poem: This ampersand and its italicized line cite and weave with Donnalyn Xu’s essay, “Ode to the Ampersand,” in the University of Sydney’s student newspaper, Honi Soit. Of the ampersand, Xu writes, “Intuition. A gut-feeling: I liked how it looked in print. How it took its shape through softness, a fluid line dancing around twin curves. I also felt quite fond of conjunctions, as the loneliest words, always needing to connect. But there was more to this than an aesthetic choice and I was drawn to its recurring presence in poems by writers of colour.”